Hugs, Granny
DOG EAT DOG I have a friend who once glued milkbone biscuits to a pair of boxers with a
note that said "It's a dog eat dog world and guess what you're wearing!" Kellie HILLBILLY SWITCHBLADE
2 wide popsicle sticks Glue the clothes pin on one popsicle stick, with the handle side of the pin
closest to the rounded tip of the popsicle stick.
Attach the 2nd stick to the opposite end of 1st, using the rubber band. The
rubber band should be in the middle of the entire piece, holding the 2 sticks
fairly tight. (notches can be used to keep the rubber band in place).
Twist the far end of the 2nd stick clockwise, so you can clasp it with the
clothes pin.
Now, if you pinch the clothes pin open, the 2nd stick will fly open, just
like a switchblade (The stick that pops out can be cut to look more like a
blade).
Anonymous GUARANTEED BUG KILLER
2 Small blocks of wood, labeled Block "A" and Block "B", with instructions
that read: Place bug on Block "A" and smash with Block "B". Thank You Loren EARMUFFS AND EARPLUGS
I have a wonderful idea, one I used last year for my christmas gag gift.
Something my family and I do every christmas........I made His and Hers ear
muffs and ear plugs........I took an old hair head band, two of them, and got
two Kotex pads and glued them on one head band and decorated them with snow
flakes.......and then I took two tampons and tyed them to the other head band
and also decorated them with a his kinda theme.......blue in color.....it was
quite the hit at our christmas...hopefully you can use this!! Melissa SPILLED NAIL POLISH OR COFFEE Bottle of White Elmer's Glue This is a great way to make homeade prank items. Pour some of the glue in a
disposable container. Depending on what you're making, pour in a color of paint
until desired clor is reached.
Now here are some ideas:
Pour the mixture into an empty fingernail polish bottle, and tip the bottle
over on some wax paper, and let it dry. When it does, it will look like
someone's spilled fingernail polish! Fool your friends and family!
Or, take an old coffee mug, and use small amounts of brown and black paint
for your mixture to get the right color. Pour a puddle onto wax paper, and set
coffee mug into the puddle, and let dry! Now you have a cup of spilled coffee to
fool people with! Use your imagination, hundreds of ideas! COW PATTY CAKE
How daring do you what to be? When the DH and I were traveling around with
the VFW we collected a set of lovely cow patties and put frosting on them and
stacked them like a cake with a marachino cherry on top. This was raffled for $1
a ticket. Of course, you have to understand all the money from the raffle went
to hospital work, so everyone bought generously. The winner took the cow patty
cake back to the post and raffled it again. The silly thing lasted for 3 years
until the traveling and dry Texas temps finally broke it down to little lumps of
dried grass.
Thank you Barb PORCUPINE EGGS
We have a plant here in NM that puts out a lovely spiny seed ball. We call it
Porcupine Eggs. I collected a couple of them, put them in a box labeled
Porcupine Eggs and raffled them off. The note inside the box told the winner
that if there was an opening in the egg the porcupine had escaped. Of course,
all the eggs were open on the top end. That one also travelled for awhile.
Hospital fund made lots of money on our silly things.
Thanks again to Barb WHO MAKES THE COFFEE?
Here is a good story to write on an old Coffee can (I would faux paint it
then use a paint pen). You can shorten this story, but I will get to that. My
wife and I were fussing one day about who should make the coffee, I said it was
her job, she said it was mine. She told me to look it up in the Bible, and I
said it was not in there about who should make the coffee. She proceeded to show
me, opened the Bible and there it was.....Hebrews. I said cream or sugar dear.
You could write on the old cans something like this" MY HUSBAND TOLD ME TO MAKE
THE COFFEE, BUT IT SAYS IN THE BIBLE HEBREWS". Sorry men, we tried. Thanks.
Thanks to Robert Cabe for this story HILLBILLY BOOB JOB
2 peach or clear balloons 1 straw
Directions: Insert balloon into bra cup, insert straw into balloon and blow
to desired size. Knot or clip to prevent shifting or air escape. Repeat for
other side. CAUTION: Stay away from sharp objects or over squeezing.
HILLBILLY HAIR DRYER
1. Inflate one large balloon. TOW ROPE FOR SHORT HAULS OIL CHANGE FOR A MINI-VAN These 2 ideas were sent to us from Rose M. Rose lives in a Sr. apt house with
units. She made up gag gifts from here and some of her own ideas for each unit.
Thank you Rose.
HENS TEETH
Put rice in a baggie. Add topper.
Thanks Crystal REUSABLE CHRISTMAS CARD
Wrap a toilet paper holder in pretty, red, cellophane. Tie at the top. Then
add a big gold bow...print out a tag that says "Money's tight and times are
hard.... So here's a reuseable Christmas card!" "MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Contributed by Lynne at Every Nook and Cranny TOILET PAPER CARD
At Christmas a friend gave me a roll of toilet paper with a verse to it and I
adapted it to include Birthdays. Here is the verse:
Happy Birthday Louise HILLBILLY POTPOURRI
peanut shells WEINER WASHER
Candi Roberts wrote: At Christmastime my family gets together to have a
hillbilly Christmas(mostly the girls). We make gag gifts and put them in a brown
paper bag and play the Wrights Family Christmas. I made a wiener washer out of
ivory soap. Just drill a hole in the middle and widdly out the middle a little
(just the right size)ha ha!!! It was so funny everybody thought they had
something big because it was so heavy.
A 50TH BIRTHDAY IDEA
Buy a wreath and glue 50 suckers around it. Take black ribbon (about inch
wide) and with glue print "50 Sucks!"--take gold sprinkles and sprinkle over
glue--attach this to wreath. Or you could use a nicer banner that reads "50 is
Fab", you could also use candies instead of suckers.
HILLBILLY BUBBLE BATH
Put some beans in a small jar and label it "Hillbilly Bubblebath" " cook and
eat two hours before bathing".
LOST MY MARBLES
I just got this from a Christmas Bazaar today. 1 marble in a small zip bag a
little bigger than a business card. A poem inside was the size of a business
card, with decorative trim around the edges. It read: "Sometimes it seems we
lose our way and life becomes so blue. You think you've lost your "marbles" and
others suspect it's true. But in spite of all the odds my friend, life can be
wonderful too. Just remember, that no matter what, I'm always here for you. So
when you think you've lost them all; pull out my gift to you. It may be small,
and only one...but you haven't lost them all!!!"
BELLY BUTTON DUSTER.
Take a sparkly pipe cleaner, cut in half, glue a cotton ball on one end and a
small bunch of flowers with bow on the other end.
BELLY BUTTON BRUSH (here's another version)
You need: any color pipe cleaner, long bead, cardboard stock printing paper,
small piece of wood (optional). Cut pipe cleaner in 3" sections. Take one end
and push down into bead. Roll remaining pipecleaner into a circle. (The bead
& pipe cleaner now look like a small toilet brush.) Put in a baggie and add
topper.
MORE INSTRUCTIONS: For the belly button duster and brush. Make a matched set
with small dowel rods about 9" long and use the pipe cleaner coiled for a brush
end. Wrap it to the rod with a small piece of pipe cleaner. Glue a white pom,pom
to the other rod. For handles, use some old ball point pens, remove the inside
and unscrew them. They work on the dowels. Put a little glue in them to hold
then on.
BELLY BUTTON BLOW DRYER
ordinary flexible drinking straw attached to a card that says:
INSTRUCTIONS HILLBILLY WASHER AND DRYER
These are a tiny clothes pin and a metal washer (you use them between a nut
and a bolt when building things) in a small baggie with a tag reading Washer and
Dryer - I usually use the name of a local town (Pozo Washer and Dryer or Hill
Billy or Redneck...)
HILLBILLY WASHER AND DRYER NO. 2
Hillbilly washer and dryer: Standard washcloth and regular clothespin is what
our Boy Scout group used for monthly training meeting gifts.
Thank you Barb
YARD STICK
The Yard Stick is a stick (with personality of course...) I made up a tag
which I attached. "This is a yard stick. I know this cause I found it in my
yard. You can do many things with this yard stick - you can check to see how
deep a mud puddle is... you can check to see how much gas is in the lawn
mower...You can play catch with dog with it... you can even use it to start a
fire. You can use it for whatever you wish, just DON'T put it back in my
yard!!!"
FISH BAIT
You put dried peas in a baggie with the instructions - "Sprinkle peas on the
water. When the fish come up to take a P** catch em!" Add topper.
RED NECK FISHING
Stick of dynamite (made from cardboard tube painted or colored red and a long
string coming out of the end.
GIFT NOT INCLUDED
I bought two AA batteries, put them in a box with a note saying "Gift not
included"
MAXIPAD BEDROOM SLIPPERS OR PADABOUT SLIPPERS
You need four maxi's to make a pair. Two of them get laid out flat, for the
foot part. The other two wrap around the toe area to form the top. Tape each
side of the top pieces to the bottom of the foot part. There you have slippers.
Decorate the tops with whatever you desire, silk flowers, etc. Add label:
Pad About Slippers BOOGER KEEPER
The booger keeper is a wooden box or whatever box you choose to use. Put tin
foil on the bottom. Then dab a few areas on a table or counter top with rubber
cement. Roll each dab around a bit and it looks like a booger. Place them in the
box on top of the tin foil and you have a booger keeper. Attach this poem:
My Mother always told me HOME EXERCISER
The home exerciser is a block of wood with this saying printed on paper glued
to it:
HOME EXERCISER Add topper
SENIOR CITIZEN'S MONEY CLIP
Take card stock and print the print like this:
SENIOR Leave enough space in the middle to glue a penny in a paper clip.
OPTIONAL: You can also make the money clip out of the tab that comes off a
soda/beer can... Just bend it with pliers around a penny.
UNFINISHED FURNITURE
A big box with the lable "Unfinished furniture". Inside the box is a branch,
leaves and all!
PORK AND BEANS
Glue a small pig on the lid of a baby food jar and inside the jar add some
dried beans.
STRAW HAT
Put some straw in a zip-loc bag and attach a tag that reads "Straw Hat --
Assembly Required"
SANTA SWITCHES
Place several switches in a small brown paper bag, allowing them to stick out
the top. Tie with curly ribbon and attach the following poem:
Cause you've not been as good as you could, PENNY PINCHER
A mini spring type clothes pin with a penny clipped in it, and write on the
clothespin "Penny Pincher" :)
HILLBILLY FLASHLIGHT
A block of wood with one wooden kitchen match in the end of it.
PUZZLE
Sawdust in a small zip lock bag labeled "Expert Jigsaw Puzzle"
SNOWMAN POOP
Take the white packing peanuts or mini-marshmallows put them in a tin can.
Add a note that says,
You've been bad REINDEER POOP - Use Raisinets and change snowman to reindeer.
DEER POOP
Just wanted to share a gag gift I made to put at my brother-in-laws game
processing place. I used the "reindeer poop" idea and embellished on it. Used
Milk Duds in the bags and attached this poem:
"Just My Luck"
I was out at the blind with my friend, Mike, © Lisa Messenger 2003
Contributed by Lisa Messenger HILLBILLY TOOTHPICK
Railroad spike painted tan and the words written on it with a black marker.
DIAMOND STICK PIN
Glue a dime on a stick ("dime-on" Stick) and add a pin back. A little card
that says something to the effect that you have too expensive of taste for our
frugal budget or explain the pun.
A ROLL IN THE HAY
I took pieces of straw and put in cellophane bags with a tootsie roll and a
tag that said "roll in the hay".
A ROUND TUIT
Write or type this verse and using a small wooden circle, stiff cardboard,
poker chip, etc., with Tuit written on it. Glue both to a card or put into snack
bag.
The faucet that leaks, Now the round tuit is here, AND ANOTHER VERSION:
THIS IS A TUIT Guard it with your life, as TUITS are hard to come by,
expecially the round ones. This is an indispensable item. It will help you
become a more efficient worker. For years we have heard people say, "I'll do it
as soon as I get a ROUND TUIT." Now that you have one, you can accomplish all
those things you put aside until you got a ROUND TUIT. Add topper.
HERD STARTER KIT To start your own herd, plant the seeds in a warm spot right side up (you
don't want the cows to grow upside down, do you? Be patient, it takes a long
time to start your own herd. For best results, moo softly while watering. Add topper.
HILLBILLY STOOL SAMPLE
A tiny wooden stool in a prescription bottle
EXPERT QUILT KITS
Tiny squares of fabric in a jar. The jar has a fabric circle to cover the top
and a cute little label that says Expert Quilt Kit. Add topper.
NORTH DAKOTAN BUILD A HOME KIT
Put sawdust in a little craft bag and put in a little paper graphic of a
bottle of glue or a glue stick. The card topper says "North Dakotan Build a Home
Kit" (some assembly required)
WILD OATS
Put shredded wheat in a little bag. The card topper says: "When did my wild
oats turn into shredded wheat?"
M & M MENOPAUSE RELIEF
To temporarily calm your craving for chocolate, eat the BROWN one. TERMITE TEASER
Put wood shavings in a bag and attach poem:
TERMITE TEASER MAGIC WEIGHT LOSS BEANS
Put navy beans in bag and attach this label:
MAGIC WEIGHT LOSS BEANS GRINCH TOOTS
Put M&Ms or Jelly Beans in a bag and attach this label:
GRINCH TOOTS To his releif, he felt so good, GOLFER'S TRANQUILIZERS
Golfer's Tranquilizers GOLF BALL SEEDS
Put beans in a bag or a seed packet (with hole cut out and covered with
cellophane) and add topper: HARVESTING: SHORT ON DOUGH
Attach a bow to a roll of cookie dough with this note: "We thought this would
come in handy since everyone's a little short on dough around Christmas time."
OLD AGE PILLS
(Use jelly beans in a large prescription bottle) ELECTRIC TOILET PLUNGER
The first year my husband & I were married we got an "electric" toilet
plunger. It was just a normal toilet plunger with a hole drilled in the top and
an electric cord w/plug glued into the hole.
FISH SEEDS
Put this topper on a little baggie of goldfish crackers.
Fish Seeds GRINCH POOP
Put green candy (M&Ms, Jelly Beans) in plastic bag and add topper:
The Grinch has been here! ANOTHER VERSION:
HO-HO-HO, Christmas is near MELTED SNOWMAN
Take a mason jar or some sort of clear jar and put water in it. Put in a
carrot, a button and two small pieces of coal. I thought about charcoal??? Put a
label on the jar that reads: "Melted snow man. May be refrozen and molded into
original snow man head. Warning: Do not drink because, well, it's simply gross!"
HILLBILLY BRIEFCASE
I took a pair of men's breifs and sewed the legs shut. Attached elastic
handles to the waist band with buttons. then i put the following into the "brief
case": I left the fly area open as this held pens and pencils really well, it will
also hold a cell phone...lol
MORE ITEMS FOR THE BRIEFCASE
HILLBILLY CALCULATOR
(This could be added to the Hillbilly Briefcase) Add a pair of feet with all
ten toes cut out of construction paper then folded like a card and inside the
card all the toes numbered. HILLBILLY PUTTER
About a 6" cut off a small log and a stick attached to resemble a golf club.
On it print "hillbilly putter."
ATTITUDE ADJUSTER
Made similar to the putter just a shorter handle made to look like a rubber
mallet. On it print "Attitude Adjuster"
WORRY WART
It is made out of a nylon stocking. A circle stuffed with cotton about 1 - 1
1/2 inches across, gathered at the top and tied with small bit of ribbon. Hair
can be added. Two tiny eyes were glued onto it. Attach poem (below).
Worry Wort
This worry wart will be your friend, SANTA SOCK
Put an old work sock (complete with holes!) in a zip-lock, and then attach
this poem:
"Official Santa Sock" CUPID POOP Cupid Poop HUNTER'S SURVIVAL KIT
Jerky, Trail mix, Chap stix, socks, bug repellant, map of the area to be
hunted etc..... ADD..2 one dollar bills so that "THE MIGHTY HUNTER"can say he
brought home TWO BUCKS... ADD..2 aspirin...incase he get's "BUCK FEVER"......
Add a frilly Garter...label it DEAR LURE...to lure my BUCK back home. A small
bottle labeled "DEAR REPELLENT'and "Not now Dear, I'm going HUNTING"
PET DUST BUNNIES
Dryer lint in a bag with google eyes.
THE THREE STEP DIET PROGRAM
Three plastic forks, for 20-30 lbs weight loss, 1 has only one tine removed
and numbered 1, for 30-50 lbs weight to lose, 2 has two tines removed and
numbered 2, 50 lbs + has all tines removed and labeled number three, all three
are put into a bag together so they can diet in a 3 step program.
FANNY FLOSS
crochet thread or heavy cotton cording, label reads for those hard to reach
areas.
DODGE, FORD, CHEVY MOTOR REPAIR KIT
Duct tape and a rubber band in a baggie.
HILLBILLY COMPUTER
A pencil in a baggy. Add topper.
Thanks LynneJ HILLBILLY EARRINGS Our Boy Scout Troop has a gag gift exchange each Christmas and a favorite
that re-appears every couple of years is the "Three Piece Chicken Dinner" 3
kernels of corn taped inside a Kentucky Fried Chicken Box Thank you Dan, Asst Scoutmaster GENERIC TOILET PAPER FOR A**HOLES Roll a strip of paper towel to look line a mini roll of toilet paper. Wrap
with a strip of plain white paper that has the words "Generic Toilet Paper for
Cheap A**Holes" printed on it. Thank you Janalyn Place a small Kazoo or simular item in a zip bag with a topper that says
"Duck Call - Instructions on Back". On the back list numbered
instructions: Thank you Janalyn SOME OTHER IDEAS
Over the hill instant face lift=a small roll of duct tape. Bag confetti items, i.e., small airplanes, boats, cars, trucks, for those who
just can't really afford the brand spankin new ones they can grow their
own. TREASURE JARS: You can make theme related treasure or puzzle jars= fishermans
treasure jar filled with birdseed and all sorts of fishing stuff like tiny
hooks, a bobber can be made from a small bead and a toothpic, tiny rubber worms,
a piece of fishing line, ice fishing hooks etc. Then there is the crafters
puzzle jar filled with crafting items, the sewers puzzle jar filled with sewing
items. the office worker puzzle jar and so on. Then for the man's man puzzle jar
only add tool related items nuts, bolts, screws, washers, wire connectors, a car
fuse etc.
Emergency rope for when you're at the end of yours = small piece of rope in a
baggie. Anti-airhead aides = two cotton balls in a baggie.
ITEMS OF INTEREST AND OTHER SOURCES
1 rubber band
1 wooden spring-type clothes
pin
Elmer's glue
Cheap finger paint
Wax paper
Props (see
below)
2. Slowly release near hair.
1. Put a short piece of rope in a
small bag and label it "TOW ROPE FOR SHORT HAULS".
2. A tiny bottle of bath oil
labelled "OIL CHANGE FOR A MINI-VAN".
Money is scarce and times are hard,
So, I'm giving you
this instead of a card.
Birthday cards are a bit of a farce,
But this will
be handy for wiping your arse!
beer tabs
beer caps
toothpicks
spent shells
Take deep breath. Place one end of dryer in mouth. Bend
over. Place other end of dryer near belly button. Blow. Repeat if necessary.
CAUTION - Do NOT inhale when dryer is near belly button.
(for the Discrete Woman)
* Soft and Hygienic
*
Non-slip grip strips on the soles
* Built in deodorant feature
* Keeps
feet smelling fresh
* No more bending over to mop up spills
* Disposable
and biodegradable. Environmentally safe
* Three convenient sizes:
Regular, Light day and Get out the Sand Bags
See Pics
Everything had a place...
So I've made this
Booger Keeper
To keep them off your face!
Just open up the tiny lid
And place them in, with care..
Nobody need know you have them...OR
SHOW THEM IF YOU DARE!!!
1. Place in middle of the floor
2. Walk around it two
times
3. Rest, you've just walked around the block two times.
CITIZEN'S
MONEY
CLIP
You're not getting what you
thought you would.
No toys or goodies under the tree,
Just ashes and
switches from little ole me.
Santa
so here's the scoop
all you get
is snowman's
poop!
waiting on the "Big One" to
get in my sight.
The feeder was full with doe all around.
But I was
waiting on that "rattling" sound.
I waited all day and finally knew
that
today was NOT the day my dream would come true.
The 30-30's all around were
popping.
But all I "bagged" were these deer droppings! Add topper.
The hinge that squeaks.
The crack in the door,
The hole in the floor.
You said you'd do it,
Just as soon as you
could
get around to it.
So my friend never fear,
You'll have all
the time to do it,
Since from this day you can't get
away with the
excuse,
WHEN I GET A ROUND TUIT.
White beans that have black spots painted
on them in a small bag. Attach a card that has a picture of a cow and reads
"Herd Starter Kit" the back reads...
At the
first sign of hot flashes eat the RED one.
Eat the ORANGE one to minimize
depression.
The GREEN one calms your frustrations, when you want to be left
alone.
If you feel a headache coming on eat the YELLOW one.
The BLUE one
reduces bloating.
If all symptoms occur at the same time, eat the WHOLE bag.
Sprinkle in your driveway
To lure termites from your
house.
THen be really sneaky
just like a little mouse
And stomp
those little pests
so you can have a rest!
1 Remove beans from bag.
2 Throw them on the
floor.
3 Bend down and pick up each bean.
4 Repeat hourly as needed.
The Grinch went down to Who-ville
And loaded up his
sleigh.
He couldn't resist the yummy smells,
And sampled along the way.
His tummy started to rumble,
Then it began to shout.
Just when he
thought he might explode,
He blasted these mighty "toots" out.
It helped him with his mood.
He
returned to Who-ville kind at heart,
But stayed away from all the food!
For relief of distressing symptoms associated with
luck opponents and stupid partners, recommended doses:
Ball in rough - 1
green
Bsll in water - 1 purple
Ball in sand trap - 1 yellow
Ball out
of bounds - 1 black
Bogey - 2 orange
Double Bogey - 3 red
Arguing
Opponent/partner - 1 of each color
Mental confusion - 2 of each color
Really, REALLY mad - eat entire bag!!!
A vine or two will provide you with enough golf
balls so you will never have to hunt for one in the rough again and that is a
pretty "fairway" to save time and money
On the back
PLANTING
INSTRUCTIONS:
Choose a smooth section of lawn.
The closer it resembles a
green, the higher the quality of the balls produced. Remove a divot of sod using
either a 5 or 7 iron. Use your putter to dig a hole about 6 inches deep - this
gives new meaning to "puttering around in the yard..." Put the seed into the
hole. Place a tall, thin pole on top of the seed as a trellis for the vine. Use
a triangular flag to number each pole. If you try to grow over 18 plants at one
time, they may not perform up to "par"! If plants are over watered, the balls
will be attracted to water hazards.
Your first crop should be ready for harvest in "roughly" 18
days. When balls mature, the flag will fall over. Carefully pull the vine out of
the ground. Under it, you should find a matched set of high quality golf balls.
After running them through a ball washer, they should suit you to a "tee".
Gas-- yellow
Constipation--green
Forgetfulness--black
Arthritis--purple
Baldness--white
Deafness--orange
Wrinkles--pink
Sex--red
The
red pill may be cut into fourths if needed.
It's known you like to fish alot,
your line dropped in the
water.
But sometimes they aren't biting,
so you can't catch what you
oughter!
When these times come, just grab
this pack of ready-to-grow fish
seed
, then raise them til they fit the size
your best "fish stories"
need! Add topper.
He left just one clue...
This little green
pile,
Of Grinchy "Pooh."
But why did he do it?
Did he want to get
caught?
As the Grinch would say,
"I most certainly did not!"
But
Santa and the reindeer
(with nose set on dim),
Landed on the roof,
And scared IT out of him!
He left in a hurry-
Homeward bound,
Leaving little green piles
All over the ground.
So here is a bit of Christmas Cheer!
I
heard from a little Birdy
Who sits on the stoop,
You been mean and
naughty,
So here is your Grinch Poop!
nail=hillbilly toothpick
old car key=hillbilly ear wax remover
cut up newspaper strips the size of toilet paper=hillbilly toilet paper
a jar of beans=hillbilly bubble bath
matches and a jar=hillbilly lantern
belly button brush
HILLBILLY TELEPHONES=two tin cans with string
atached to both.
HILLBILLY CELL PHONE=one tin can with an antenna
HILLBILLY MICROWAVE=magnifying glass(uses the sun to cook)
And when your day is at it's end
Just relax..........worry no more,
Cuz that's what this little wart is
for.
My puppy must have stolen it
On last year's
Christmas Eve.
I hope that Santa's toes weren't froze
When he had to
leave.
I'm passing it along to you
As quiet as a mouse!
And THIS
year if he's lookin' for it
IT WON'T BE AT MY HOUSE!!!!
Put Cinnamon Hearts, Message Hearts, Sweet Tarts
in a bag with the following topper:
Couldn't send you flowers
And candy wouldn't do
Mushy
cards just didn't say
The things I wanted them to
So I got you something
special
And here's the inside scoop
I found you something very rare
It's genuine Cupid Poop!
Attach earring hangers to two car air
fresheners. Add topper.
1-remove Duck Call from bag
2-place device to lips
3-Yell "here ducky,ducky, ducky"
Over the hill
make-up brush=a cheap paint brush for painting walls.
Musical notes confetti can be given to the person who just can't carry a
tune, you can give them a bag of notes!
Tiny little Christmas presents that
are meant for miniatures, these could be given for someone who is wishing for
that very expensive present, they can grow their own.
I just
read a good recipe book called Denture
Wearer's Cookbook and I laughed so hard I thought I'd, well...you know. What
a great book to get for that old Uncle that puts his teeth in his pocket to eat
or anyone else for that matter. This book has plenty of good recipes and they
tell you whether you can chew easy or chew hard. Stop by to see it and tell them
Granny sent you!
©Homespun Hideaway